'I Just Called To Say...wait, hold on'

I don't celebrate Valentine's Day.  I never really liked the day much.  People should celebrate their love every day, and I'm sure they do.  It's just ridiculous that we have yet another holiday that has Christian connotations yet is also completely stripped of its religious context.  It's yet another excuse for Americans to go out and spend their money on things that they do not really need, namely chocolates, plastic perfumed roses, and giant teddy bears.  I'm all for flowers.  Buy your sweetheart flowers every chance you get.  But don't go buying roses that are hiked up to twice the price just because you feel like you have to get your sweetie something on February 14th.  It's just another day.  You really don't need to get perfume or heart shaped silk boxers.  I swear, all of those annoying noise making cards and stuffed animals that sing 'Wild Thing' or 'Muskrat Love' should be put into a large bonfire and like a Viking funeral, be sent out to sea.  

I realize that I sound like a complete grouch.  Many of you are probably saying, oh well this guy needs to get some lovin'.  But I'm married.   So there goes that argument of yours.   I think the real issue is that I've never liked the gushy sappiness surrounding Valentine's Day.  In high school, I would wear all black and go around giving people un-Valentines (with black hearts and messages of doom).  In college, my friends and I had a Goth anti-Valentine's celebration by moshing to heavy metal and grunge and then drinking coffee/chain smoking at a local coffee shop where we saw some locals who had the same idea as we did.  Even though I'm not single and I have a family now, I still do not like Valentine's Day.  I think it's a crock of crap, really.  Like I said, it's another excuse to spend money on things on someone who will probably be an ex-something in less than a year.  It's fine if you buy a card for your dear old grandma or your angelic children.  Even cooking dinner for your husband/wife is a nice touch.  But people really go way too far.  

So in my spirit of anti-Valentine's, I have a mix for you.  I tried to make it 14 songs, but then there were too many good ones.  I tried to limit it to 28, but I extended it to 30.  So now you have a song for every day of February, including extra for leap years.  

With no further adieu, here is my Valentine's playlist.  

1) 'Love Gun' by Kiss (1977)

2) 'Love Hurts' by The Everly Brothers (1961)

                                              Nazareth's version (1975)

3) 'Bad Medicine' by Bon Jovi (1988)

 

4) 'I'm Gonna Follow You'- Pat Benetar (1980)

 

5) 'Heaven on the 7th Floor' by Paul Nicholas (1977)

6) 'Love' by The Smashing Pumpkins (1995)

7) 'Sour Times' by Portishead (1994)

8) 'My Lover's Box' by Garbage (1995)

9) 'Love Buzz' by Nirvana (1988)

the original Shocking Blue version (1969)

10) 'The Perfect Drug' by Nine Inch Nails (1997)

11) 'Hate Then Love' by The Dears (2008)

 

12) 'Song for the Dumped' by Ben Folds Five (1997)

13) 'Satellite of Love' by Lou Reed (1972)

 

14) 'Shady Love' by Scissor Sisters (2012)

15) 'Love Boy' by Dana International (2007)

16) 'Get Your Hands Off of My Woman' by The Darkness (2003)

 

17) 'Terrible Love' by The National (2010)

18) 'Only Love' by Grace Potter and the Nocturnals (2010)

19) 'Addicted to Love' by Florence + the Machines (2009)

Robert Palmer version (1986)

20) 'Love Will Tear Us Apart' by Joy Division (1980)

21) 'Sewing the Seeds of Love' by Tears for Fears (1989)

22) 'Always' by Erasure

23) 'Believe' by Elton John (1994)

24) 'Crying' by Aerosmith (1994) 

 

25) 'Nobody Lives Without Love' by Eddi Reader (1995)

26) 'Everything About You' by Ugly Kid Joe (1991)

27) 'Apologize' by One Republic (2007)

28) 'No One's Gonna Love You' by Cee Lo Green (2010)

original by Band of Horses (2008

29) 'Part Time Lover' by Stevie Wonder (1985)

30) 'Who Wants to Live Forever' by Queen (1986)

I hope you enjoyed that non-sappy, hopefully more original rendition of songs that celebrate February 14th without being too Celine Dion/Whitney Houston/Mariah Carey cliche.  So get out that box wine and turn up the volume on these.  Drown your sorrows in some songs that celebrate the real meaning of heartache and sorrow.  That is how Valentine's Day is truly meant to be celebrated, crooning and moaning along to songs for the broken hearted and commonly misunderstood.  

And by the way, it's ridiculous that while our society has a day for love that many Americans still cannot show their love openly (yes, I'm talking about the gays).  Everyone is all for love and affection as long as it exists between a man and a woman.  For the record, I don't like PDA of any kind but if we're going to have a day honoring it, then you might as well include everyone.  Right!?  So know that my personal boycott of February 14th also has to do with our bigoted views of homosexual relationships.  If we're gonna let the love light shine, then let everyone shine it brightly.  

See, I'm all for love, just not the commercialized, consumerist kind.  You can't box up and price my love.  Love is far too powerful of an emotion to be packaged as a categorical commodity.  Love is love.  Let yours shine. 

Love unconventionally, unconditionally,

~R~

Valentine's Sham

Really, what is the big f-ing deal about Valentine's Day? It is another day where commercialization and consumerism make us into zombies. Chocolate..flowers..cards...urgh blergh.

So, here's a novel idea. Why don't we tell our loved ones how much we love them EVERY day of the freakin' year? Why don't we learn to live each day like it's Valentine's Day, like it's our or our loved one's last. A little depressing and sad? Yes, but we all are mortal, right?

So why do most of us get caught in that web of mania on V-day and go (LADY) gaga looking for the perfect card, the perfect gift. Then, next year you will outdo your gift from last year. I mean, why not buy jewelry tomorrow to tell your wife you love her? Why not get some champagne this weekend to show your boyfriend how much you care? Take your loved one out to dinner on some other day of the year. For F#$@'S sake, give an IOU for a foot or back rub on a day of the recipient's choosing.

I mean, really, isn't this day a clever ploy made up by Hallmark or some other big corporation like 1-800 Flowers or Godiva. C'mon people!!

Does anyone even know the origins of the damn holiday. Or has it become like Halloween, St. Patrick's Day, even Cinco de Mayo, AND Christmas, where all origins and religious ties have mostly been broken.

I spared you the hard work, and I did some research, reading articles on both NPR and The History Channel, I edimicated myself on Valentine's Day. According to the NPR article, the Romans were very keen on observing the Feast of Lupercalia, which is thought to be some form of an origin of our Valentine's Day. (1)

The Romans observed this feast from February 13th to th 15th by killing and sacrificing dogs and goats. The best part, however, is when the men celebrating would beat the women with the hides of the animals that were killed for the sacrifice. Brilliant, right? It gets better. The women were willing particpants (and they were naked); they believed that being beaten with dead animal hide would increase their chances of getting pregnant and having children. Women and men were also paired off together and copulated for the duration of the festival. Sounds like a hootinany, huh? Well the sex, drugs, and rock 'n roll couldn't have lasted forever. Later, Pope Gelasius I combined St. Valentine's Day with the pagan Feast of Lupercalia in an attempt to discourage people from practicing pagan rituals. (1) I think he was just an old prude! Who doesn't like a good orgy, anyway?

Where does 'valentine' come from? Well, glad you asked. Supposedly, according to the NPR article, Claudius II, a Roman emperor, had two men killed who were both (ironically) named Valentine on two separate occasions. (1) Why were the men killed? It is thought that one of the Valentines was a priest who was banned from performing marriages because Claudius II thought that single men made better soldiers than men who were married with kids. I guess they were more focused? More energized? Why couldn't he have just given them Red Bull? I guess Claudius didn't want his men to start weeping at the thought of never seeing their dearest loves ever again if. If they were loners and losers, then they'd fight better, right? Well, Valentine countinued to perform marriages against Cladius's decree and 'off with his head'. (2)

It is also possible that one of the Valentines helped break Christians out of Roman jails. It was fashionable back when Christianity wasn't so popular administer torture and abuse to Christians. Then when, Christianity became more popular, they returned the favor by torturing and abusing non-Christians. Persecution is the gift that keeps on giving. Anyway, so it is also thought by some that Valentine, himself, was put into prison and fell in love with a girl who may have been his imprisoner's daughter. He apparently wrote her 'the first valentine', but sources are very unclear about this. (2) If you ask me, it sounds like a horeshit kind of story.

And the card thing? Shakespeare and Chaucer mentioned it in their writing, and the art of sonnets and card making became the vogue thing to do in the Middle Ages. Then during the Industrial Revolution, card making took up speed in America. Hallmark started to churn out cards by the hundreds in 1913, and so you can blame them for all those sappy Cathy, Ziggy, and cute cat/dog Valentine's cards. In 2010, this country spent 17.6 billion buckaroos on this damn holiday.(1) Now we have our current Valentine's holiday of pink, red, and white puke-o-rama. Can't you tell I love it! Actually, in high school I used to paint my nails black, dress in all black, and go around the hallways quoting Edgar Allan Poe. How ROMANTIC!!

I guess I should end this entry by listing some great tunes/videos to listen to on this day of February 14th. I'll leave it as a top 10 list of great V-day songs (no particular order of best to worst..just a list). Some are covers, some are songs you've never heard of or may not associate with valentine shmalentine..well I don't give a f-! Deal with it!

10. Harry Nilsson- 'Without You' (especially the visual from the movie 'The Rules of Attraction':THE FOLLOWING IS GRAPHIC AND NOT SUITABLE FOR 18-
9. Stabbing Westward- 'Shame'
8. Cameron Stenger- 'Wicked Game' (original by Chris Isaak)
7. Portishead- 'Sour Times' (this was my MS anthem)
6. Eddi Reader- 'Nobody Lives Without Love'
5. Miles Davis Quartet- 'My Funny Valentine' (the Chet Baker version is great, but it's overdone)
4. Nirvana- 'Heart-Shaped Box' (the video is BRILLIANT)
3. Nine Inch Nails-'The Perfect Drug'(again, the video is BRILLIANT)
2. Radiohead- 'Exit Music (for a Film)'
1. Stevie Wonder- 'Part-time Lover'

There ya go folks. Happy Valentine's Day however you choose to spend it (or not spend it). I will end with something one of my friends said on Facebook on Valentine's Day:

"Feb 14 is just another day....a day we should use to tell the people we care about that we care about them. Husbands, wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, friends, siblings, parents, family, children, students, people we work with.... Etc etc....doesn't need tone written in chocolate or rose petals.... Doesn't need to be on a card.... Just a smile as you walk by.... Stopping to sincerely ask how someone... is doing or a good laugh in your office. I personally like a special day in the middle of a dreary month that focuses on the positives of being human... Our remarkable ability to cherish the people around us. And if you choose you can just treat it like any other day....."
(Thanks, Kristyl)

All the best for a peaceful existence!

Yours truly,

  ~R~

(1)-http://www.npr.org/2011/02/14/133693152/the-dark-origins-of-valentines-day
(2)- http://www.history.com/topics/valentines-day